Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
