O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
