Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
