You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
