Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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