My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
