She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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