I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
