Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
