Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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