She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
