Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
