I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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