and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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