Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I deserve to be covered in dicks
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
