Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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