I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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