Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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