She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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