Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
