I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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