The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We need to get me chipped asap
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
