I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
