My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Randomize