Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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