Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
