I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Fuck appropriateness.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
