why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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