Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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