He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
