Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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