i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
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