I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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