dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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