I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
