why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
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