Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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