All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
