If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
