my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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