Say something about gay babies.
he thought i was a dude.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
