I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
