Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
