Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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