just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
