Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
