i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
