i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
