ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
