I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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