Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
he was CRYING into my vagina
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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