omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Randomize
